afternoons

spill into sheets

white as snow sheets

touching lips sweet

with someone sweet.

the sun lauds us for making it shine

Best Summer of my Life in prose-ish form

I spent this afternoon gripping my tube for dear life

still that flatlander at heart and terribly nervous with water.

I'm drenched, shivering and my ass bangs against the rocks.

It's one last adventure before school begins, 

an adventure capping off a notoriously good summer. 

Boulder delivers and my love for it flows.

It began in Illinois, exorcising old demons, 

going full circle with what had brought me to where I am. 

"It was for freedom, 

from myself and from the land"

It was my last time in Illinois.

For once, I felt like a big girl with a big girl job in the city. 

I took my loyal road bike Nancy on the bus

and COMMUTED like a boss, like a true Boulderite. 

I pounded soil with dainty hammers, counting endlessly. 

rolled dirt into skinny worms, washed cars, 

listened to talk radio, made friends with conservatives, 

people who gave me rides.

I dressed up like a TinWoman and skipped the yellow brick road

with a Scarecrowette, Dorothy and a Lioness.

I went to California with my best friends

and took a deep breath. 

It was lush scenery, frozen water beaches, farmers markets, delicious food

and the very best company a girl could have.

There were times I was mad

and I raged in Utah. 

Spent my days floating in class 5 calm, drinking and smoking. 

I slept under stars on tough desert ground,

made friends with snakes and toads and scorpions, 

sang along in the dark, watched illegal fireworks illuminate the sky

and learned the true meaning of 'merica.

I played hockey too and was part of the summer champion phenomena. 

There was a party reported to the police, Christmas in July, 

trivia at the bar, barbecues galore, my very first baseball game. 

I also joined a kickball team for a lark, 

wore my rain boots the first shivery, wet day of play.

Met new friends, 

talked to a strapping young man at the bar

which turned into a marathon of phone calls, 

and sitting out at the same time with the sun on our faces. 

The same one who held my tube with great difficulty this afternoon. 

He only does it cause he likes me which I think is grand. 

The year must begin. 

The end does too but I have had the best summer of my life. 

zipping sleeping bags together

crunchy grass 

presses into my skin

as I hear

the saddest story

in the whole wide world,

as I kiss the sorrow out of you

with the best

drunken slurs of consolation

I can muster.

hope floats 

under starlight,

riding on present

where we have been

and all that can happen. 

Post Insomnia

I stayed up all night
painting away.
I look up to see the first light
and since the painting's in honor of him
I take up the helmet and strap it on tight
mount noble Judy, the mountain bike.

I love the way pink dances, stains the sky
around the sun.
I love the way the air is cool
night's breath still whispering goodbye.
I love this mountainous affair
the way he makes me try.

I pedal past  the ponies,
past trailer parks up to the mesa
to the view I love the most
Mountains, I will keep you.
This is all your fault, my friend.
Boy of mine, I'll keep you.

Free

I am free
as a juniper breeze,
light and shining
like a firefly.
I will leave unhappy spots
and start again.
At least I'll try.

I'm laughing at you

be nice she says

tell us straight she says

do not flog us publicly on the world wild web.

I suppose you're right

I concede

there really is no need

to tell everyone how much

I really want to run away.

whoops.

I want you to know

I think violent thoughts about all of you

I think about the irony 

that the girl with the largest room 

is never at home. 

Never cleans house,

never pays rent on time. 

I look upon hatefully

the full circle I've made. 

Again I'm adjacent 

to gunfire.

to some schmo who can't take care of 

his young dog. 

I live with a  girl who won't drink 

who takes things subtley. 

I took MY bike back tonight

and hid it. 

oh the things I could do....

How much greater would my sanity be

if this would all go away. 

Seriously.