Today

I am allowed to gloat....this one time.
Then I'll shut up, promise.

He dumped me this day.
The last day of break.
I was asleep in the back of his uncle's car
drowsily climbed the stairs to our apartment
sat on the couch full of anticipation
that we had reunited.

Then he let out those ominous words
I'm moving back to Illinois
It's all kind of blurry but the message was definite.
And I sobbed
Ironically on a love seat.
How dare he make a hipster out of me.

All I can say now is
Fuck You
and
Thank You.

Today I woke up to the sun
and slept in
Lingering with my favorite blonde
and his slightly lavender eyelids.
Time heals
and I'm ever so happy.

I've had the adventure of a lifetime this year.
I moved three times,
I kissed a dozen boys
almost died
went skiing
played lots of hockey
danced my face off
drank on weekdays
got a job playing with dirt
fell in love with mountains
met someone new
What's not to like?

Thank you for the memories
and thanks for letting me go
when I was too stubborn
to see something was definitely not working.
I'm much better for it.
Incredible,
how one day can change
your entire life.

Hold

You've got a hold on me
wise Sinatra once said.
I want to freeze time sometimes
on these timeless gray-skied mornings
when the sun gives you no warning,
when we're still entangled
under sheets
half asleep
(I can tell, kissing your eyelids)
mumbling "I like you's"
"darling won't you stay?"
let's put life on hold,
wrap your fuzzy arms around me
let's touch, nose to nose
yes.
I'd like to stay.

I Want

I've got piles of paper
a midterm
knots and knots of
red tape sorrow
and all I want is out.
I want the middle of nowhere
the open grass and fragrant meadow
oh home sweet Illinois
in the summertime.
The powdered snow wonder
that is Colorado
The trail leading to the tops of mountains
I want to camp under a blanket
moving in and out of sleep
I want to see a sunrise in a canyon
I want so skate fresh zamboni ice
sleep under stars

nude

You lost a bet, a most glorious bet
lucky for you
with a pencil I'm deft.

I am drawing the zigzag mess of your blonde hair
your blue, honest eyes downcast,
intently focused on Garfield.
You're trying so hard to ignore me. 

I am drawing that sharp angle of your shoulder,
the hand cupping your cheek,
arm perpendicular to the bed.
the slope of your body to the curve of your ass,

your most beloved wedding vegetables
I try to do justice.
The long dancers legs
How I love they can skate
to the tips of your toes
that have long lost their feeling.

And I make the swirls
of the hair on your chest
the shadows that give you
the fullness, the depth

when I'm done being surprised
there's always still something left.

Bus Ride i.e I think you're wonderful

Things that mean nothing ease away
Float to pin-points like stars in the sky.
I'm watching those stars with my head on your shoulder
This late night bus-ride back into Boulder.

I'm happy to be here, I could stay awhile
You're holding me close as we pass city lights
You mean to me oceans, your gravity's there
bundled in wool, fraught with Hurst hair.

There will be talk of Bronco's games, how the Avs lost.
But I'm happy and warm with the guy I like most.
And all through the bus ride we'll stay like this:
Dreamlike, content, an occasional kiss.